Trying to add numbers that don't exist.

She waited for sixteen hours. For sixteen hours, she stood outside my door in silence. She gave me sixteen hours, and then moved on.

I awoke to the smell of burning paper. Suprise, suprise. It was eight fourteen and the clock had been going off for twenty nine minutes now. I was late for work. Again. I looked out my apartment window. The sky was overcast and the streets were littered with scraps of glass. Three men were huddled around a trashcan furnace and a fourth was drinking from a brown paper bag about twenty feet away. There was blood everywhere. I reached for my towel, undressed and walked into the bathroom. Mold lined my ceiling and a leaky pipe dripped onto my toilet with a persistant "plip clop" about once every four seconds. I turned on the shower and looked at myself in the mirror. I looked at my hairy chest and stared at the fat that it covered. I looked at my dirty feet that were peeling and at my toes that were laden with blisters. I laughed. I am not attractive. I don't care to be. I'd rather wear a paper bag over my head than be happy when I look into the mirror. Right. I scrubbed as hard as I could for an entire hour, until my skin was red. I turned off the shower and stood naked in my bathroom for three minutes without moving. I just stared at my pathetic body and wondered what it would be like to live in a home that was more comfortable than this. I thought about what it would be like to be in love, to be confident or happy. I walked around my apartment naked for at least ten minutes, in which time I ate a biscuit and drank my morning beer. I put my clothes on and walked to the door. KNOCKING and I hear "Open up!" I hadn't had company in quite some time. I opened the door and was suprised to see Janet.

I loved Janet. She had snuck up from nowhere and had commitments to keep. Janet loved me. Janet was beautiful and stable. Janet could read and write, and Janet could sing. Janet loved me because I was me. Janet looked past the fat and the blisters. Past the hair and the dirt. Janet gave me time, which I needed. I wondered how long it would last. I sat silently and she sat with me. I stood and escorted her to the door. She stood outside.

She waited for sixteen hours. For sixteen hours, she stood outside my door in silence. She gave me sixteen hours, and then moved on.

I heard the familiar knock next door and listened as a new story unfolded.

Joe loved Janet. She had snuck up from nowhere and had commitments to keep. Janet loved Joe. Janet was beautiful and stable. Janet could read and write, and Janet could sing. Janet loved Joe because he was Joe. Janet looked past the fat and the blisters. Past the hair and the dirt. Janet gave Joe time, which he needed. I wondered how long it would last.